Goodbye Sleep

Oh Sleep, how I miss you terribly.... Since Barret turned six months there have been few occurrences of him sleeping through the night. We cuddle him and love on him in all the ways we can, but when it comes to the middle of the night he just loves to scream. He will scream for hours on end if we let him, and there is no changing his mind. I love the silent moments, the moment when you think he finally did it, He finally conked out and is asleep, and just as you start to think this a sudden burst of tears and screaming abounds.

I often wonder what happened. What was so special about turning six months that he decided he was no longer going to sleep soundly through the night. What happened at six months that he suddenly felt like mama and daddy weren't going to keep hims safe. What happened at six months that we are no longer aloud to get a full nights rest?

To make matters worse, Barret loves to wake up with the sun. And when I say sun, I really do mean it. 5:00am comes all too soon, when you are up through the night with a crying baby and you just want to lay your head on the pillow and not hear screaming and not feel like you are doing the wrong thing and not feel like your son doesn't think you love him. 5:00 am comes bright and early, and with that so does a bouncy baby boy who doesn't seem to be affected by the little amount of sleep he acquired the night before and is excited and ready to start the day. That little bouncing baby boy will let you know what he thinks of you trying to catch a few extra winks with him laying in between mama and daddy in the 'big' bed, by simply trying to gouge your eye out, or scratch your arm to shreds, or pull on your hair, or climb up you face to try and reach what lies beyond....an alarm clock and/or a baby monitor that are bright and shiny and light up...or a combination of it all.

The day abounds with laughter and happiness on Barret's end, and once 7:00 am rolls around Mama and Daddy are ready for the day as well. As we finally, if we aren't already, mosey on out to the living room, shut the baby gate, turn on the radio, and lay on the floor with our oh so happy baby boy. We watch him crawl around and climb up and down our bodies as he tries to be super adventurous and is so excited to show us what he can do. By this time we are awake and there is nothing that can take away the happiness we have in watching our little boy seek adventure and try new things, there is no amount of lost sleep that could make us upset with him for making us be awake....

And as the clock just clicked over to 1:53am, the baby room falls silent....I sit and wait to hear one more cry for mama, or one more shriek of please come and pick me up daddy... I hear silence. Ahhhh silence.....for a mere one minute....and we are back listening to our midnight serenade and tears and shrieks and a waterfall of white noise in the background.

One of these days Barret James you will learn that night time is sleep time and that crying in the night is only going to give you a loss of sleep and that there is no use in crying, because in the morning we get to see each others smiling faces. You will learn that not only is your dark room and comfy crib a peaceful place to sleep, but it is also a place for you to rest your head from the long day you just had. You will learn and understand that Mama and daddy are right across the hallway and we are here to keep you safe. You will learn that your heavenly Father is watching over you to make sure you are safe and sound. You will learn that just because you can't see us at that very moment we still love you and are still here and you will see us in a few short hours... when the sun comes up and the clock strikes 5:00 am.

Summer is coming to a close

Here are some photos of what we have been up to lately.

As summer seems to be coming to a close we are trying to take every advantage we can to enjoy the sun!

We snuck down to a garage sale a couple weeks ago and found Barret the cutest little Adirondack chair. Mama also snagged a few things to keep on hand for Barret's first birthday.

We have also tried to enjoy as much of the pool as possible. We love when Daddy gets to go with us and last week we went four times!!!!! One night we went, we were one of four families at the whole pool! It was a lot of fun.

We have also had our fair share of picnics for the year, Three nights in a row! But hey, who doesn't love a grilled hot dog and all the chips and cookies you can eat?

I have also graduated from the whale tub to the big boy tub....Mama's only worry is that Barret loves to stand and tries repeatedly to stand up in the tub. Despite our lengthy talks on dangers in the tub, Barret continues to try and stand, usually with much success, and then goes on to just babble as he tries to climb out. Other than trying to get out of the tub, he seems to much enjoy the tub. I think he is trying to figure out the difference between the tub and the pool....

Uncle Mike and Tete Chelsey took a trip to Ohio and picked Barret up some really cute Ohio State clothes! He is going to be very stylish once football season rolls around.

Uncle Jason left for Tech School on August 9 and we went up to say goodbye to him the day before. We won't get to see him until January, maybe even later. BUT, we do get to talk to him while he is gone this time, which is super exciting. We have already gotten to talk with him twice and we are waiting anxiously for him to set up his skype account so we can see him!

We have been trying to introduce Barret to some real foods despite the lack of teeth, and so far Barret is very interested in watermelon, strawberries, and pears. As long as he can eventually pick the piece of food up he seems to enjoy it. We just have to keep close watch on him because he really just sucks the juices out and one of these days I am afraid he is going to suck so hard it's going to go right down his throat...no good! Other than fruit, Dad decided to give Barret a cheese ball the other day, needless to say there was cheese all over his face and hands, and the cheese ball disappeared in a matter of seconds. He is also very attracted to the sugar free wafer cookies that we all know and love... Barret loves them too! Graham crackers, rice cakes, and sun chips are a few other foods Barret has come to try. (You probably think we are terrible people giving our son cheese balls and cookies at such a young age. But I will have you know that this is not by choice, I have mentioned before that Barret is an aggressive eater, he lunges at things and now that he can move around at his own will, he will grab it right out of your hand or off your plate.... there is no stopping him!)

Nap times are another story.... you walk in the room because it is quiet and you want to check on him... this is what you will see !

And look how big I am compared to Norman now!

On the move!

Barret is officially on the move and going, going, going. I would like to say that I can't keep up with him, but so far that is not the case. Barret loves to wiggle his little body over to us if we move just out of the way, and he know exactly what he wants to get to. I love leaving the room and saying come and get me, he looks at me with a little confusion, and then laughs and takes off. He really is doing a great job and crawling from room to room in order to keep up with me. It is so fun to watch him crawl to his toy bin. Once he gets there he tries to climb up and pull everything out. He seems to have this fascination with making a mess (already) and then starts to wail when there isn't anything of interest to him in the bin until we swoop him up and place him back down on the ground for him to crawl to the next item of his hearts desire. He also loves his diaper bag, crawling under his jumparoo, the coffee table (which I have mentioned about before), and the baby gate that has a clear window so he can see right down the stairs at anything or anyone that might be looking up at him.

He is really getting pretty fast, but he still would rather sit and play and roll around. He doesn't seem to mind too much if he can't crawl around, and watch out...if you help him to his feet he will try to take off walking. Last night we did laps around the driveway while Daddy grilled our dinner. It was so fun, and Barret's new shoes from grandma already look like they have been through their fair share of hikes up the mountain. He LOVES walking, and there isn't anything you can do to stop him. If he wants to go, you better go otherwise it is an all out war to make him happy. If he wants to go and he is already standing at the table or the couch and you aren't in arms reach he will try his very best to cruise that piece of furniture and reach as far as he can to grab onto that next piece of furniture.

I love seeing my little guy on the move! It is so fun

"Monkey-ing Around"

Our little Barret has become so brave! If you take your eyes off of him for even a second, he could be off and crawling into the next room, or following you to your destination, or climbing on the furniture. He seems to love climbing on our coffee table. I pushed it up against the wall to give him optimum playing room and to minimize the sharp scary corners around. However, those corners aren't the only part of the table that makes it dangerous. That extra little shelf that holds all of our books, magazine, random articles of Barret's clothing, and everything we have ever checked out of the library. Barret LOVES that shelf more than any piece of furniture and seems to gravitate towards it no matter what toys or people are available for play. While this isn't a bad thing, it creates the dangers of head 'bonking' and face 'smacking'. He has the "I know how to move" part of crawling down. But the depth perception and the when to stop part hasn't quiet come yet. So while we are having fun climbing and crawling, the scary boo-boos and smacks and bonks from the table are neither few nor far between.

(I am in the process of trying to figure out how to make this safer without having to purchase those super expensive guards. Any thoughts please let me know.)

Unblissfuly Unaware

About three weeks ago we took Barret to his six month check up. This was a wonderful treat for us for many reasons, one of them being we finally have a doctor that we like; and she made me, for the first time in my short term of fatherhood, look like a genius. She told us that it is time to let Barret start screaming it out a little bit at night, a direction I had been begging to hear for a few weeks. Before the calls to DCFS are made to remove me as a father, understand that we still check on him to make sure his head isn't stuck in between the railings of his crib or anything, but instead instilling a slight amount of, what some would call independence to our son. Or what I would call, a full nights sleep. This thus far has not really gone as well as desired. The first night we tried it, an hour later he was still screaming. Strike one on us. We have tried a few other times since and were foiled again and again.

This all leads up to last night. After dealing with a horrible Sunday night, seeing Barret sleep from 8pm-10:15pm and from 1:15am-4:30am, something was going to have to change. B has not been feeling very well the last few days, as evident by the never ending flow of the gooey like fluid substance flowing from his nose and the constant coughing and sneezing (although I have to believe most of he coughing is his ploy to garner a little bit more attention). But hey it works, maybe I should try that too! So after a night of little sleep for me and less sleep for mom we decided to give it a try, one more time. We laid him down about 8pm, and at 8:02 the first cries were heard. At 8:10 I used the stealth tactics that made Rambo so deadly in First Blood, to locate the pacifier that had gone rogue from B's mouth and reinserted it into his crying mouth, moments later silence, as my little man crashed after a day of no sleep quickly came to its close. But, alas 3:30am rolls around and so does our little mans appetite. While we don't want to reinforce middle of the night eating, with teeth coming in and the cold beating on Mr. B, depriving him of a sense of comfort seemed a bit too harsh.

After a brief eating session it seemed as though our little guy had drifted off to sleep once again. Right as mom and dad were about to join him we again heard the calls of our little man. As we laid in bed I reassured my wife that he would be OK and that he needed to learn to put himself back to sleep. At first they simply seemed like cries of annoyance, but as they continued to increase in strength, as well as frequency I decided it was time to pull out the Rambo one last time. As I stealthily entered the dark room I made my way towards his crib. In order to remain unseen, I bent down to swoop my arm quickly around what few blankets I could see in hopes of finding the missing pacifier. Instead of striking gold on my blind swoop I struck my son, right in the side of the torso. Turns out he decided that he would stand up! Holding the side of the crib to get a look around the dark room he found himself stuck and couldn't seem to get back down. Instead of sitting down he screamed, and while trying to be a good dad, I left my son stranded, crib side, as I was determined to teach him something. I did actually teach him something: that dad is often wrong, and while I try to grow him and teach him new things I will inevitably do more harm then good. It is a good thing that he has a Good and Perfect Father in heaven who will grow him and teach him new things, that will be painful but at the same time infinitely beneficial. How awesome is it that while I am making my son suffer for no real reason He can still use it to show how Good He is.

My Favorites!

I love the way Barret is learning to crawl, putting in every effort he has, grunting his little grunts, flopping on his belly and then pushing himself right back up onto all fours.

I love the way I walk out of the room for one second, and when I come back he is no where near in the same place he was when I left.

I love the way we play peak-a-boo in his crib and he giggles and giggles so much I think he is going to get sick.

I love the way he cries at night and I come into his room and see him standing up in the crib and he can't get himself back down.

I love the way he whispers, "dada, dada, dada" throughout the day while he is pondering his toys.

I love the way we dip into the big kid pool and go for a swim and his face never shows anything but a big gummy smile.

I love the way he thinks it is okay to suck on my phone and completely kill it, making me wait for it to dry out so I can use it again.

I love the way he wakes up with a smile and giggles from his naps.

I love the way Daddy and Barret play in the mornings so Mama can get a few extra minutes of sleep.

I love the way he tries to escape his stroller and carseat, like he is saying, "Mama, I am too big for this, I can sit, why do you keep putting me in this thing?"

I love the way his hair is growing, and his eyes are so blue, and his hands are so so soft after he gets out of water and rubs my arm.

I love the way he grabs on tight to my arms or my neck like he is never going to let go.

I love the big, huge smile he gives Daddy when he comes home from work, and how he gets all giddy about Daddy finally being home to play.

I love the way he pulls my hair and thinks it is the funniest thing in the whole wide world.

I love that Barret destroys anything put in front of him, like the computer desk when he sits with me and I check the email.

I love that he throws things on the floor, and he would rather chew on the spoon than eat his dinner.

I love how he can be in the middle of a crying fit and Mama or Daddy will do something silly and he will start laughing hysterically and then go back to crying...

I love how he is growing and I miss his little self already; I'm excited for what is to come and sad for what is now over, but the excited and the love that my Baby Boy has brought is absolutely wonderful!

So Big!

Barret is becoming such a big boy! He is officially crawling now (that is only when he really wants to). He started saying "dada" in this little whisper-ish voice and then gradually increases his intensity in the little sound he is making to a full out yell of "dada, dada, dada". I know he doesn't know what he is saying but it is beautiful and wonderful and I am so happy that he is saying it! His voice is so perfect, he has this whisper thing that he does during the day when it is just Mama and Barret, and it is like a song playing throughout the entire house, "dada, fafa, gaga, oooahh" He loves to make noises and I love hearing them. They are so precious and so perfect, and I never want them to stop.

Despite all the babbling that Barret is giving off and the crawling and the climbing and the standing, he still does not have even one tooth! I know they are in there somewhere, they have to be. He cries, and wails, and bites, and gnaws, and drools, and drools, and drools.....I have read a million and one books and magazines and pamphlets from the doctors office.... those are all signs of teeth! He has had these signs for months it feels like, and they are gradually getting worse and worse, but still, no sign of those little pearly whites breaking through. I love his gummy smile and I have mentioned I would be fine if he never got his teeth so I could always see that perfect and delicious gummy smile, but really, I do want him to get teeth! Life will be so much easier for him if he gets his teeth.



Barret survived another trip away from Mama and Daddy this past weekend and thoroughly enjoyed his time with G and G Gaffney. They smothered him with love and plum wore him out. He slept well the night they left and I was thankful for that! He even got to play in his pool in his birthday suit!